


I could never forget

by super1_who2_locker3



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - College/University, Bucky is a engineering major, F/F, Fingering, Lesbian Sex, Lesbians, M/M, Multi, Nightmares, Poor Bucky, Praise Kink, Steve is an Art Major, Threesomes, gonna have some light bdsm soon, le gay sex, sad bucky, warning drug use, warning- physical abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-24
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-03-19 09:08:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3604446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/super1_who2_locker3/pseuds/super1_who2_locker3
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve and bucky were childhood friends when they were suddenly pulled away by a tragic incident. They both now attend NYU and then one night they bump into each other. They get to know each other all over again, old childhood feelings begin to resurface as they get closer as they once were.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there so this is a Stucky College/University Au. i warn you there are some feels in this chapter. this story will be quite a long one, so bear with me when it comes to updates since i have university deadlines soon. I have an amazing Beta doctorbdamned on Tumblr! check her out.  
> so feel free to review, bookmark and kudos whatever you think of the story. opinions are welcomed here.  
> enjoy! :) 
> 
> Warning! mention of physical abuse in this chapter.

Chapter 1-  
12 years ago  
Steve was sitting at the table in the back of the classroom, keeping to himself as he usually did, drawing lots of pictures to pass the time. Steve preferred to draw than to play with the other children, they were always rough with him but if he saw a child being a bully then he wouldn’t mind getting hurt to help that helpless kid. One day he was up to his usual workings in the art corner when a brunette haired child began to hover him strangely . Steve began to get frustrated and looked up the kid with annoyance.

 

“What are you doing?” he asked, eager to get rid of the nuisance that was bothering him.

“I wanted to see what you were drawing. You're always here, you know? I was wondering why,” he admitted, a big childish grin began to spread across his face. Steve couldn’t stop himself from responding with a slightly smaller smile. He sighed and continued to draw.

“It’s a superhero with a really strong shield that looks like the flag and he is fighting all the evil aliens that want to take over new York!” he mumbled, giving Bucky a fed up look before dropping his head back down to finish drawing

“That is so awesome!” Bucky exclaimed, giggling happily as he seated himself next to Steve, picking up the nearest car beginning to poke away at it wishing it was a real car. “I'm Bucky,,” he said, though he didn’t look up from the car he was playing with and nor Steve from his paper.

“Steve” he mumbled in reply, not really thinking about what was happening around him, just that he had finished his picture. There was one thing Steve Grant Rogers would never do and that was leave a drawing unfinished.

“Steve…” Bucky repeated slowly, “I like you Stevie. We shall be friends!” he demanded before jumping up and wrapping his arms around Steve’s skinny body. He just managed to hear Steve breathe out a small laugh.

“Yay,” he rejoiced before letting go and giving him one last look, picking up his car and began fiddling with it. “Well Stevie, there are some cars that need a’fixing. I will be back” he said, ruffling his hair before he ran away outside to play mechanic like he did nearly every day. As he was running away, Steve managed to tear his eyes away from the paper and look at the back of the kid as he rushed past the door. He smiled to himself. 

\------

Every day they began to create a routine between the two of them, allowing them to be better friends. They would always meet at the arts and crafts table - Steve drawing and Bucky attempting to take apart a new toy car each day. While Steve was drawing, Bucky would do most of the talking for the both of them. He would aimlessly babble on about his future and how he has dreams of fixing cars and all types of machines. When he could see that Steve was in deep with his work, he would ramble on about the different cars that he had seen and which ones were his favourites. At the current it was a 1970s Chevy Impala that he saw on a television show one day. Bucky was now learning all about bikes and began dreaming of what cars he would own when he grew up.

 

“Captain America rides a bike,” Steve interrupted Bucky for the first time, stopping his drawing to show Bucky his picture of Captain America riding on a bike with the shield on his back, an intense serious look on his face as every superhero had. Bucky threw his head back in laughter, appreciating Steve’s attention to his pointless ramblings.  
“Well, maybe Cap needs a mechanic, a trusty sidekick.” He offered, a sly grin on his face. Steve instantly understood Bucky’s request and began to make plans of what the character would look like. As the days progressed Bucky’s character became realistic before he finally completed the profile. He looked back at it with pride, unable to hold his excitement for when he showed Bucky. Even his mother had taken a liking towards it. The next day he searched for Bucky and when he found him he shoved the paper in his face.

“Tadaa!” he squealed excitedly. Bucky took a moment to process what he was seeing. When he finally did he couldn’t resist jumping up and down as the joy of what he was looking at. 

“Thank you Stevie!” he gasped, trying to catch his breath from all the excitement. “He’s perfect!” he giggled furiously. He straightened himself up trying to look all high and mighty.

“I am going to call him The Winter Soldier” he proclaimed proudly. He loved it so much that he never let go of the piece of paper. As soon as he went home he begged his mother to stick it up on the wall so he could stare at it forever. The days went on, and Steve found himself spending his weekends at Bucky’s place, where they would run around acting like Captain America and The Winter Soldier, fighting together to save the world from all the super villains that dared to stand up against them.  
They would take turns sleeping over at each other’s houses, staying up late playing games and talking about what they want to be when they grow up. Steve was gushing about being a world famous artist that would be selling his paintings for lots and lots of money, but if Bucky asked nicely he would let him keep one for free. Bucky would brag about how he would be the best mechanic out there. Everyone would be begging to get their cars fixed by him, he always joked about people purposefully breaking their car just so he could fix them.

The night always ended the same, Steve and Bucky laughing, Steve’s head resting on Bucky’s stomach as they drifted off to sleep content with the world.

\------  
A year later on Bucky’s parents began to drift apart, feuds replacing common conversations within the household had made Bucky a bit anxious. He would come in to school with a fresh set of bruises on his body. Apparently his father wasn't trying all that hard to be subtle about it, and Steve would catch sight of them whenever Bucky was stretching or getting changed. He wanted to talk to him about it but he knew what caused them and he knew there was nothing he could do. It was those moments when he truly desired to become Captain America and storm into Bucky’s house and end all his suffering. He knew deep down that Bucky was not deserving of all the pain he was receiving. After Bucky's dad had been dealt with Steve would shower his friend with unexpected hugs and kisses to make sure he knew he was loved but didn’t want him to know why. Either way he was certain that Bucky knew. He was sure that Bucky had caught him in the act of staring but didn’t say anything because he didn’t want to put Steve in an awkward position.

\---  
To Steve, Bucky was the best person to exist in the world. Well, after his delightful mother of course. The nights that Bucky knew things would get tense in his house he would beg Steve to come over and keep him company. He didn’t have to tell him why because Steve just knew and there was no way he would abandon his best friend when he was upset. He knew that if he pouted enough at his mother she would have no choice but to cave to his demands. The next thing he knew Bucky was letting him in the house from the back door and they would hide in his room as the fighting occurred in the background. Steve knew it would be best to just stay quiet and be there for his best friend. They lay in his bed as Steve kept his arm around Bucky, making sure that he was as safe as he could keep him. He would feel him begin to shake out fear and worry, but all he could do was tighten his grip and hope to calm his friend down by quietly shushing him.

“Hey, hey it’s going to be okay Buck, I got you” he reassured him over and over until he was certain Bucky couldn't doubt what he was saying. He started to run his fingers through his hair, knowing full well that it would make him at least a touch drowsy, if not asleep. He heard Bucky let out a soft sigh before closing his eyes and tucking himself beside Steve, head cradled on his chest, hands clutching Steve’s white shirt as he felt himself drift to sleep. 

“Thank you, Stevie,” he heard bucky mumble into his chest, “you are the best person ever. I love you.” He sniffled, a sad smile forming as the words left his lips.

“One day I will marry you so nothing bad will ever happen to you. Captain America will always protect The Winter Soldier for as long as he can. I am with you till the end of the line pal.”

Bucky chuckled in response.

“Till the end of the line” he mumbled, full of sleep, yawning but not falling asleep. Suddenly he heard a shriek and the sound of a person hitting the floor. Bucky flinched and scrunched his eyes tighter in response as if he were hit himself. The sounds of Steve’s hushes replaced his mother’s distant cries. Before he fell into his slumber he managed to catch a whispered voice saying ‘I love you too, Buck” and small pressure on the top of his head made by Steve’s lip. However, he was very certain that he must have been dreaming.

The next morning Steve woke up to his usual blue walls when he was expecting to see Bucky’s white walls. He automatically reached out for Bucky, and when he felt the empty space his heart sank. He had been too deeply asleep to feel his mother coming to pick Steve up and carry him home earlier that morning, when Bucky’s mother had found them lying in his bed. He knew that he couldn’t go over there and check up on his friend. He would have to wait until Monday morning.

\----

When Bucky woke up he clutched the covers expecting to feel Steve, and when he realised that he was all alone he buried his face in his pillow to muffle his cries and soak his tears. However, he was stopped short when he felt his mother’s delicate touch on his back, alerting him to the fact that she had started to pack all their items.  
“Come on sweetie, we have to go now!” his mother demanded in a low hushed voice as to not wake his father up. Bucky could sense the urgent tone in her voice and jumped out of the bed in an instant to help her pack. He tried to hide his tears but his weakness got the better of him as he sniffed and wiped his face as much as he could. Once they were finished they both crept out of the house and got into the car as quick as they could before there was any chance of getting caught. As his mother hastily drove away, they went past Steve’s house and he felt his heart break at what he was leaving behind. Bucky never got to say goodbye to his best friend. He held his head in his hand and rested his forehead on the cold window glass. He bit his quivering lip to stop himself from crying too much. “Bye, bye Stevie. I am with you till the end of the line,” he whispered before closing eyes to end the pain caused by what he could see.

\-----

Monday morning arrived and it felt like an average day for him when he woke up and got ready for school. He could barely contain his smile at the thought of seeing his best buddy soon and was all over that his mother who could hardly keep herself at laughing at his adorableness. When he reached school he couldn’t find Bucky and automatically assumed he was late for some reason. He passed the time by drawing in his usual spot, which without Bucky felt lonely and empty - but he had faith. Time continued to flow and there was still no sign of his friend. Steve was beginning to expect the worse, that he couldn’t save him, protect him like he had promised. For now his best friend was gone… 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter. I want to thank again my lovely wonderful Beta- DrBdamned. I also want to thank those who have commented, making me motivated to continue this story despite my lingering doubts. Also the readers! i can't do this without all of you guys <3
> 
> Enjoy and tell me what you think! :)

12 years later

Steve never truly forgot Bucky. He was his childhood crush and his only friend at the time, and so Steve told himself that when he graduated and managed to make his name out there, he would search for his missing friend.  
\----  
Bucky had hit couple of rough patches when he moved to Manhattan but his dream to be a mechanic never faded. He had requested a single room, and with his current problem that took a shape of a metal arm, NYU caved in instantly, knowing that they would look bad if they rejected him. However, that did not stop his new friend Natasha from practically living with him with the amount of days that she stayed over. Natasha and Bucky were as intimately close as friends could be. One day they thought it would be interesting to see what would happen if they kissed. Bucky couldn’t argue that Natasha was a beautiful woman despite her fear inducing personality. Their experiment finished as soon as it had started and they instantly agreed that Bucky was still full on gay and Natasha was just not into those types of men. They spent the rest of their night cuddling in his bed, watching TV.  
\----  
Across the hall, Steve had moved in with Sam Wilson; a physics major. They hit it off instantly. Steve was the cook of the dorm, while Sam was like their maid. He would do the laundry and the washing up when needed - they were beginning to have a routine.

Growing up, Steve had taught himself how to play the guitar after he had found his dad’s old one in their loft. He kept himself going when his mother got sick and lulled her to sleep nearly every night. Despite what Steve thought, Sarah thought her son had an angelic voice and it made her forget how much pain and agony she was in for that brief moment. He would be by her bedside with the lights dimmed as he sang the classics of Louis Armstrong, Elvis Presley and Johnny Cash; his mother’s favourites. Even after she had gone into remission from her lung cancer, it had become a routine that they both had enjoyed and so they continued until the last day before he moved out for college.  
When he moved in he walked past the Musical Society’s stall in the fresher’s fair and was drawn in, signing up without a second thought. The young English accented woman also had its effects. That was when Peggy Carter and Steve Rogers became friends.  
\----  
Bucky’s engineering degree was frequently co-inhabited with the Physics majors, taught by the university’s infamous lecturer and best engineer in the tri-state area; Tony Stark. Bucky was sitting on his own in the middle row, in deep thought when he was interrupted by a slow, “Dayum...”

He turned and found a pair of dark eyes fixated on his shoulder region. “Can I help you?” he inquired at the unknown presence, growing more confused by the second. 

“It’s just so beautiful and shiny…” the stranger said as if in a dream state, hands beginning to ghost excitedly across his arm. 

“Um thanks, so Physics, I am to assume?” he caved in and indulged in the small talk with the mystery man. There's a first time for everything, he told himself. 

“Whatcha think?! But first things first, I am going to dissect the inner workings of this magnificent piece of machinery.” From then on they sat in the same seat - Bucky using the time to catch up on his lost sleep, while Sam would poke and prod Bucky’s arm.  
\-----  
Today was Sam’s birthday and, as he was all about being the centre of attention, he organised a big birthday party for himself. Steve and the band were a special request made by Sam to play as entertainment (Steve just couldn’t refuse his friend’s pouty lips). Sam instinctively invited Bucky, but was not aware of his intention of not going.. All Sam wanted to do was get drunk with his buddies, search for woman, find a man for Steve and whoever Peggy had her eye on that evening. 

Later that evening Bucky was getting ready for a quiet night in, his reading for the next day prepared with multi coloured highlighters this time. He was in his tracksuits and a black vest top, his hair up in a loose ponytail - his most comfortable attire. Just as he was getting comfortable in his bed, a loud bang and the sound of heels clicking made him jump up and position himself in defence. He breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of Natasha in his doorway. 

“Get up loser, we have a party to go to and I have lips to kiss and hips to grind on,” she demanded with a sly smirk on her face. Bucky grimaced at her words before he threw his books at her and flopped onto the bed, hiding underneath the covers.

“Go away,” he mumbled like a little child. 

“Whatever, Barnes! You haven’t had any in months, okay, and you get so bloody grumpy when you are deprived of sex. I will not suffer any longer!” she argued while getting the first pile of clean clothes that she could find in the midst of the dirty lumps on the floor. “Get your ass out of bed, bitch.” She demanded one last time, pulling the covers away dramatically, glaring at him until he caved. 

“Screw you!” he groaned.

“You love me,” she giggled, winking as she left the room.  
\----  
Steve was backstage and his nerves were beginning to unhinge, making him a pacing, trembling mess. His band has played gigs before, but none with this sheer amount of people. He was beginning to regret agreeing to Sam,

“Damn you and your pouty lips,” he grumbled to himself. 

“You know you love them,” Sam joked behind Steve, grabbing his shoulders to massage the tension away. Sam gave the best massages and Steve always said that Sam had magic hands. He breathed a sigh of relief as Sam massaged his tensions away. 

“You got this big guy, you are doing this for me after all, so no need to be nervous.”

“Thanks.” Steve smiled, pulling away from Sam’s grip so he could join Peggy in the last minute preparations behind the curtain. Sam took that opportunity to exit and mingle with the rest of his guests.  
\---  
The moment Bucky entered the club he regretted his decision to join Natasha, though he was beginning to wonder whether it was his choice at all. Out of the many pet peeves that Bucky developed, big crowds of people were the worst. He automatically felt uncomfortable and out of place squeezed between two unknown bodies. 

“I need a drink,” he mumbled into Natasha’s ear before leaving her to continuing flirting with the first hot girl she'd laid eyes on. He fought his way to the bar, ordering a beer, and deciding just to rest there for the time being. His moment of peace was cut short by someone sliding into the chair next to him and snaking his arm around Bucky.  
“Well, well, well. Look who actually decided to turn up!” Sam joked, ordering a drink for himself. 

“Yes, well, you can thank that malicious red head over there for that.” Bucky pointed in Natasha’s direction, unable to stop glaring at her.

“Looks like I owe someone a thank you,” he got up and dragged Bucky with him. “I refuse to have someone act all sulky at my birthday party!” he demanded. He kept going towards the direction of the red head despite Bucky’s insistence for Sam to let him go. Once they reached the two girls - who had clearly gone way past the flirting stage - Sam cleared his throat and waited. 

Bucky chugged the rest of his drink down, “Natasha, Sam, Sam, Natasha. Now that we know each other’s names, can we get some more drinks? I need to be a bit more inebriated if I am going to stand here any longer.” Sam and Natasha laughed, ignoring Bucky’s request completely. 

“So this is the birthday boy? Well I can count myself lucky that I walked through that door tonight” 

“James here says that you are the one I have to thank for his ever so charming person to my party.” Sam inched closer to Natasha, forgetting that there was a girl right next to her. Sam liked to take risks, it was his winning move. Natasha raised an eyebrow in curiosity and slight arousal. 

“James? Wow, I haven’t heard anyone call him James since the first day I met him, and that was when he introduced himself to me.” Natasha laughed as if she had an inside joked running through her head. 

“Wait, so what do yo-“

“ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD NIGHT, MANHATTAN?!” a loud British voice interrupted Sam’s question, making him forget and change his focus. “Well we are all here to celebrate the birthday of a bloody bastard by the name of Sam Wilson.”

“YOU GOT THAT RIGHT!” Sam shouted in response, grinning like a complete idiot. 

“Love you too, darling. Anyways, we are the live entertainment until the DJ gets here for the nitty gritty nonsense. We will take requests if you have any. Our only request for you is to drink, dance and have a good time!” She finished, handing the mic to a tall broad blonde with a guitar, who caught nearly everyone’s attention. 

“Damn,” Bucky whispered, as he just kept staring, subconsciously licking his lips. Sam turned around and gave Bucky a wink before running off into the crowd to dance to the music. Buck was slowly feeling the rhythm of the music, hands stuffed in his pockets as he swayed to the beat. The next thing he knew, a young guy was suddenly in front of him looking confused, but the moment he saw Bucky’s face, a smile formed. Hands were now on his hips, the mystery man moving them for him as he pressed their bodies together. Bucky looked up in time to see Natasha laughing, mouthing “you’re welcome” before she was being whisked away. The dancing between the two men was getting more intense and as Bucky felt a warm breath across his neck he let a moan escape his lips.

The man took that as a good sign, and pressed his lips to the pressure point on Bucky’s neck. The grip Bucky had on the stranger’s clothes tightened as he pushed himself closer to him. Bucky hadn’t been with another guy for a while now and he forgot how pleasurable those little touches were to him. He didn’t care that he didn’t know this guy, he was feeling much better than when he woke up that morning. It was clear the guy that he wasn’t looking for anything, and Bucky decided to take advantage of that. 

“Come with me,” he breathed out, hand clutching the man’s arm as he dragged them both through the dancing people until they reached the bathroom. Bucky shoved the man into one of the empty stalls and pushed him against the wall, pinning his hands over the guy’s head. 

“You know this is nothing special right?” Bucky needed a confirmation before he proceeded any further.  
“Do I look like the cuddling type?” 

Bucky attacked the man’s soft lips as he let go of his wrists with his non-metallic hand and fiddled with the fly of his jeans, internally cursing Natasha for making him wear the skinniest jeans he had. His lips travelled down the prominent jaw of the man as he shimmied himself from his jeans. The moans that mystery guy was making were nearly enough to make Bucky hard, but he needed that extra touch. He spun the both of them around so he was against the door. Bucky needed, he craved, the dominance when he was with anyone and now was his moment to exert it.

He grabbed the man by the back of his head and pushed him down on his knees, but before he could demand what he wanted, the man’s lips were already travelling along the outline of his dick bulging out in his boxers. Bucky’s moans got louder and dirtier the more the man worked his mouth. The bloke tugged at the waistband of Bucky’s boxers, wasting no time for foreplay. The next thing he knows the fellow’s warm mouth engulfed his cock, nearly hitting the back of his throat to add a little tease. Bucky was not a big fan of that.

“Quite teasing!” he grumbled in sexual frustration causing him to fuck the guy’s mouth, trying to build the pit of pleasure in the bottom of his stomach. 

The sensation of the guy’s tongue softly caressing his shaft sent shivers all over his body. The vibrations made by the man’s mouth as he moaned was pushing Bucky closer to the edge, his thrusts into his mouth more erratic, and the grip on the man’s hair much tighter. He let go of his dick with a popping sound, eyes filled with lust as he looked up, 

“Why did you stop?” 

“Any chance you could loosen the grip on the hair?” he asked with a hint of fear wavering in his voice. 

“Shut up and finish the job” Bucky demanded, ignoring the guy’s request. “Oh god, right that’s it, keep doing that,” he moaned as the man’s tongues ran across his slit. The closer Bucky got to cumming, the looser his hands became. The hot tongue focused on Bucky’s sensitive slit and that was when he lost control. 

“Fuc-“he groaned slightly too loud as his gripped the top of the stall, shooting his load into the back of the stranger’s throat. The man squeaked in surprise but in transformed into a low moan as he milked Bucky dry. Bucky stood there, legs weak and breathless, still holding onto the edge of the stall wall. 

The guy stood up, pride beaming on his face as he leaned to kiss Bucky’s mouth, stopping short when Bucky placed in his hand on his chest, gently shaking his head in disagreement. He gently pushed the man back to give him space to the put his boxers and jeans back on. Bucky looked up to see the sexual frustrations on the guy’s face and caved in. Pushing him onto the closed toilet seat, hands reaching for the man’s jeans. 

\----  
Both men walked out of the bathroom showing clear signs of just what had been occurring in there. Bucky’s hair was loosening from the hair band that was attempting to hold it together, and the mystery guy’s shirt was out of place, as well as his hair. Bucky patted the man’s shoulder, giving him his best smile, a bit too toothy, before heading towards the evident red haired woman amongst a group of people. He slithered into the conversation by leaning on Natasha’s shoulder as she found another woman to fulfill her flirting needs. All he was able to detect a British accent but the music was too loud for him to really know.

Picked up the sound of two men arguing and all he could get out was the blonde with his back to him and a smaller blonde with a hearing aid looking thoroughly annoyed for some reason. He was intrigued to know what the argument was about since it looked quite intense. 

“Don’t think we didn’t notice you back there…” Natasha’s voice brought him back to reality. He shrugged in response, unable to think of a witty comment in that moment. “Well at least one of us got some action tonight, right Bucky” She joked, nudging his shoulder with her own. Sam seemed to only then realised the answer to his previous question.

Bucky opened up his mouth to say something offensive to her like he always did whenever they bantered, but was interrupted by the one deep voice he had least been expecting to hear tonight.

“Bucky?!”


	3. Chapter 3

Bucky turned his attention to the source of the voice, confused to how the stranger knew his preferred name. He began to think that it may have been one of his one night stands but he knew he would remember a face (or a body) like that. He was also certain that he never let them know he preferred that name to James. 

“Excuse me?”

“Oh my God. It can’t actually be you!” The blonde continued to gape in awe at the sight of him. Bucky was beginning to feel a little creeped out.

Bucky took a step back and deepened his glare at him. In doing so he got a better look at the guy's face, and he had to take a step back as though struck at the goofy smile that revealed dimples Bucky could never forget. There was only one other person who knew him as Bucky.

“Captain America…”

“Winter Soldier.”  
\----  
Steve had never been in this much confusion since the day he found out his best friend had left him to face the world on his own. Seeing Bucky, in person, was like a whole new experience for him. His mind was fading into a blank slate but his body did all the talking. He found himself closer to Bucky as his arms embraced him tightly. Feeling Bucky’s head settle on the crook of his neck and his arms closing around him made Steve feel like he was home. He could tell that Bucky was feeling the same as he heard a sigh of relief escaping his lips. They stayed like that for a moment, forgetting that there was a crowd of people staring at them in wonderment and confusion. Natasha was the first one to ruin the moment when she has finally realised what was happening. 

“Steve, I presume?” 

The both of them broke the hug and stood there grinning like complete idiots, knowing full well that they couldn’t mask their excitement. 

“Yes, I am Steve, it is nice to know that you haven’t forgotten me either”

“I sense you guys have a lot to catch up on.”

“Damn right we do! About what? 12 years... ish...” Bucky questioned curiously, leaning into Steve’s arm as it draped over his shoulder. 

“I think so, either way it’s a long time. I still can’t believe we go the same college. I mean, what are the odds?”

“Very little.” 

Sam groaned, wanting some attention now, “Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Old friends reunited, my heart is warm and fuzzy with emotion. However, I would like to remind you about this thing we are at. A PARTAY!” He shouted above the thumping music, throwing his hands up in the air, showing clear signs that he had too much drink that night. The people in the background who had heard him whooped in response making everyone in the group laugh and whoop back feebly. 

\---

Sam turned his attention to Natasha only to catch Clint making eyes at her, and something within him ignited. He walked up behind him and whispered in Clint’s ear in a menacing tone. 

“You are on, she is mine, bud.”

“Challenge accepted. But first - shots?” 

“A man after my own heart.”

“Fuck you.”

“Love you too, darling” Sam chuckled, grabbing Clint to his side, ruffling his hair in the process. They both disappeared into the crowd and headed towards the bar arguing about who would be the victor for Natasha’s affections. 

\---

As the number of people in the group lessened, the less attention there was on the two guys who were clearing ignoring everyone else just talk to each other. They were a mess of giggles and little touches on the arm, chest or wherever their fingers would find in that moment. Peggy and Natasha decided that it was best to make use of the time and drink some more. Natasha easily interpreted Sam and Clint’s body language towards her and was not surprised. It was hardly the first time men had been pining her, but this time she had someone else set in her sights. She picked up her glass of vodka and her eyes sought out for the dumbest looking idiots on the dance floor, and a mischievous idea creeped into her head when she found her target.

“How about we play around with those two lovesick puppies?”

“Oh, I am liking this already. What have you got in store for them?” Peggy downed her shot as she exchanged a look of smugness. 

“Well what harm would it be to make them dance around me for a while?” 

“I like your thinking,” 

“Thank you very much, darling,” Natasha attempted her British accent and raised an eyebrow seductively. 

“Come here!” Peggy grabbed Natasha from her coat collar and kissed her, pushing her against the bar top. Showing her apparent arousal at Natasha’s seduction. Peggy released the kiss, breathless with her bottom lip caught between her teeth. “You definitely need to do that again,” she chuckled light before grabbing Natasha’s hand and leading her into the dance floor.

“Whoever said the British were boring”

“Shut up and dance with me.”

Natasha could hide her smile as she pulled Peggy by the waist until their hips were touching, and they began to sway to the music. Natasha’s hands roamed around Peggy’s body, the brunette squirming against her in response. Natasha took that as a sign to continue and teased the girl, fingers coaxing her skin just under her shirt causing Peggy to moan into her neck. As Peggy’s fingers entangled themselves into Natasha’s bright hair and sighed happily as she leaned into the soft caress.  
\----

Steve went to get something from his pocket and that was when we realised that there were all alone now, and he didn’t have a problem with that at all.  
“You know parties aren’t really my thing.”

“But what about your awesome 7th birthday? That was definitely your thing.”

“You were the only one there!”

“And? It was still a kick ass party,” Bucky retorted, smiling fondly at the memory. “Yeah I am not a big fan of parties either, too many people.” 

“How about some air?” Steve suggested, and Bucky nodded but went first to the bar to grab two bottles of beer then ran after Steve through the bar entrance. He found Steve perched on the pavement and joined him, handing him his bottle. 

“I don’t want to be a buzzkill and ask the hard hitting questions, but I just- I have to know. Why did you leave? I mean, a little warning would have nice. You know I blamed myself for months? I actually thought it was something that I did and that was why you never said goodbye.” Steve rambled, taking a sip of his drink to shut himself up. Bucky was looking at Steve as if he had just told him his puppy had died. He could clearly hear him swallowing hard. 

“Steve…” Bucky started but was evidently showing a form of an internal struggle, Steve was now regretting asking the question now. 

“It’s okay, y-"

“No, I am fine.” Bucky interrupted, fingers fidgeting with the bottle. He seemed to be unable to look Steve in the eye, and kept his focus on his feet. “It’s just that mum and I had to go... you know, Steve, I know you know. You were there the night before.”

Steve could hear the wavering in his voice. His hand automatically found itself on Bucky’s shoulder, remembering everything he had heard that night and how much he hated seeing Bucky suffer. 

“I feel as though I shouldn’t ask about the arm?” 

Bucky froze again and managed to nod his head, he wasn’t ready to talk about that crucial and most terrifying moment in his life. He hoped one day in the future he would be able to brave himself up and tell Steve - he had a right to know, after all. 

\---- 

Bucky wanted to just be there with Steve and reveal everything that he had experienced before and after he left. However, his walls immediately came up and he froze like a stone. When he felt Steve’s touch he relaxed slightly, but still kept his eyes down. He knew what his friend would thinking and he was certain that he couldn’t handle the look of pity. It was the same look he got from his mother, his classmates at school, and even Natasha. He bit his lip to stop himself from saying anything he would regret straight after. 

“So you play guitar?” 

“Yeah, one of the many things I learnt to do.” Steve laughed, hand now back on the ground. “I learnt for my mum, I guess it reminded her of dad.” 

“How is Sarah? I have to admit it has been 12 years since I have had a decent cheesecake.” Bucky reminisced. 

“Better,” Steve knew that now what was not the time to go into detail about his mother’s past; that was a story for another time. “I know that she would definitely like to see your face again.” 

“Don’t think she would be too happy with the whole arm and hair deal.” He lifted his bottle, “cheers to the good old days?” 

“Cheers.” 

They both sat there enjoying each other’s presence, listening to the sounds of the environment as they finished their drinks. Steve finished first and Bucky felt Steve’s hard stare and looked back at him confused. 

“What?” 

“Your hair, I just don’t understand why.”

“Are you fucking serious, Stevie?” 

“What made you commit such a heinous act?” he questioned intensely (though Bucky could see the twinkle in his eyes that gave away Steve's joking), his hands reaching up to run through the soft brunette locks. Bucky was not one to admit that he thoroughly enjoyed the sensation of fingers running through his hair. It distracted him from the fact that he was trying to hold back his laughter. 

“I think it frames my face quite nice actually,” he grabbed the front of his hair and pulled around his face as he gave Steve a small pout. 

“It’s refreshing to know that you are still a big dork” 

“Why thank you very much. It takes one to know one, you know,” Bucky gently shoved Steve’s arm, chuckling lightly. 

Just as they stopped laughing they were interrupted by a loud voice booming right behind them and they both turned their heads simultaneously. Bucky looked through the gap of the door and managed to see a flourish of red and the sound of angry voices, and concern began to grow within him. 

“Um, Steve, I think something is going on inside. We need to check it out.” Steve nodded and followed behind Bucky back into the club. 

“GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF HER! SHE IS MINE, OKAY! YOU FUCKING BASTARDS!” 

“Peggy, leave them alone, they aren’t worth it!”

Bucky rushed to Natasha’s side helped her in holding Peggy back as she tried to attack Sam and Clint, while Steve aided his friends.  
“Nat, what happened?”

“Well I suggested that we play around with Sam and Clint. We were teasing them, luring them in to me with no intention of actually doing anything. Then Sam decided to be brave and surprise kiss, which is, apparently, why Peggy is flipping out.” 

“Has she had a lot to drink?”

“Um, quite a bit actually.” Natasha confirmed as Bucky gave Peggy one big tug towards him and she came tumbling down on the both of them in a fit of giggles. They all groaned in pain, shuffling around awkwardly, trying to get grounded on their feet. Steve straightened out his friends and hurried to Bucky’s side to aid him up. 

“You guys okay?”

“All peachy down here.” Bucky confirmed, laughing as he looked down at the giggling Peggy on the floor. “I think it's home time for us,” he suggested wrapping his arm around Peggy’s waist to hold her steady. Steve nodded in agreement as went to hold Sam and Clint on each arm. 

“The halls are only a 5 minute walk, I think we can survive that, right?” Steve shot Bucky a reassuring smile as Bucky led the way forward and out of the stuffy bar, at last. 

\----  
The walk to their halls was a struggle, to say the least. Peggy had tripped on multiple occasions, bringing her helpers down with her. Bucky would occasionally catch her mumbling how she wasn’t feeling so good but Natasha reassuring her with little comments of “It’s going to be okay, baby”, “We are nearly there” and “I got you darling, stay with me” in her ear. Bucky was unable to keep his small smiles at their adorable displays to himself. He was beginning to wish that he had someone who would put up with him like, that but he knew that it wasn’t possible for him. He didn’t deserve that amount of happiness in his life. 

He looked back at Steve and caught a glimpse of the three amigos bickering over an issue that Bucky was not quite able to catch. However, the display of the boys was enough to get him laughing. “You good back there?” he shouted to his back. 

“We've been better,” Steve admitted loudly back to him. 

They had reached the entrance of their building and Bucky managed to just about reach into his pocket with his free hand and use his key card to get them in. The moment he saw the stairs he had never been so thankful that they had an elevator; not wanting to imagine the horror of trying to get the drunks up two flights of stairs. They all squeezed uncomfortably into the small elevator and let the quiet music fill in the silence. Bucky would every so often steal a glance at Steve just to clarify to himself that he was actually there, looking like he did. He felt Peggy relax slightly in his arms and looked down to see her starting to drift off to sleep. 

“Hey, Pegs, wake up.” He shook her and she jumped in shock, looking around as if she had forgotten where she was. The elevator dinged when it reached their floor. “At last!” Bucky mumbled to himself, stumbling out of the lift and making his way to his door. When they finally reached he turned to Steve. “Well, this is me.”

He was unable to decipher Steve’s look, “I am literally 2 doors down! This is just getting crazier. Wait? Are you the one that sings late at night with the piano in the background?!”  
“Uh, yeah… I didn’t think anyone heard me.” Bucky rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. He'd never told anyone that whenever his insomnia would kick in or he had his frequent nightmares, he would stay up in bed and write songs for Natasha’s dance compositions. He found that it relaxed him, it removed all his anxieties from his mind. 

He was too busy focusing on Steve that he hadn’t realised that Natasha and Peggy had made their way into his room. He turned his head when he heard low level laughter coming from inside. 

“You need help with those two?”

“Yes please!” Steve pleaded, handing Clint over to him and leading the way to his room, Bucky following behind. Once inside, he gently laid Clint down on the sofa Steve showed him and covered him with the nearest blanket. He jumped when he felt a light touch on his shoulder and laughed when he looked back at Steve. 

He watched Steve as he sat down on the floor in the kitchen, waiting for Bucky to join him. He sat down next to him and kept his sights on Clint, watching him sleep peacefully.  
“Well, tonight did not end as I thought it would…”

“You can say that again,” Bucky joked. 

“So I was thinking since we have 12 years to catch up on that we could get together and have some coffee tomorrow, maybe? After our lectures?” 

“That sounds like a great idea, Stevie. I finish my lecture with Tony at 4, if that's okay with you?”

“Perfect!” Steve exclaimed happily, grinning wildly.

Bucky checked his watch and his eyes widened when he realised how late it was getting. He stretched and stood up, Steve standing up with him. “I should go, someone needs to check up on those two. God knows what they could be doing.” Bucky shuddered at the thought. He instinctively went in to hug Steve, lingering for a little longer at the welcoming touch. He let himself out, “Tomorrow,”

“Tomorrow,” Steve reciprocated and gave Bucky a small wave as he shut the door. 

\----  
When Bucky entered his room the last thing he expected was to see Natasha naked, head buried in between Peggy’s thighs as Peggy was writhing and moaning, body glistening in sweat. “Really, guys? You couldn’t have done this at your own place, Nat?” Bucky shouldn’t be one to complain, given the multiple times that Natasha had walked in on him with another in comprising positions. 

Peggy was too engrossed by what Natasha’s tongue was doing that she didn’t acknowledge Bucky’s presence. Natasha responded by waving her hand at him, motioning him to leave them alone to their activity. Bucky rolled his eyes and shuffled his way to his room. 

“Please don’t make too much noise,” he pleaded before slamming the door shut and removing all his clothes before he went to bed. He was disturbed by the sudden desperate moans.

“Fuck, Natasha! Yes! Right there. Yes! Yes! Oh Go- BLOODY HELL!” 

Bucky rolled his eyes and grabbed his headphone and blared his music on full volume, unsure of how long those two would take to finish. He lay there, hands tucked behind his head as he stared at the ceiling, a goofy grin on his face. He began to think about his childhood and the memories that he and Steve shared years ago. He remembered their mini adventures and late night talks. Now that he had Steve in his life again he couldn’t wait to make more memories and fulfil promises that they made to each other long ago. When Bucky finally drifted off into sleep, his dreams were filled with his blue eyed dork, and not one nightmare came to him that night. Little did he know that Steve was doing the exact same thing in his own bedroom, both looking forward to what tomorrow would bring them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how are you finding Peggy and Natasha? do you guys think it is working? So yeah I would love to hear from all you guys about how I am doing and what i can do to improve! or if you guys want to suggest anything for later on in the story. Thanks once again for reading this, it means so much to me :)


	4. chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey i am so sorry that i am so late in updating this! it has been a hectic couple of months now. If anyone does care about this story then i am totally back and will be making regular updates  
> A big thank you for Doctorbdamned for being my beta and doing a wonderful job at that! :)
> 
> The bit in italics is Bucky having a nightmare
> 
> Warnings!  
> Mentions of physical abuse, the bits in italics but after and before that are fine
> 
> Feel free to check me.out on tumblr- Arthurandhisclotpole- come and talk to me about stucky, marvel. Literally anything! :)

Bucky woke up and recalled the events that occurred the previous night. Had he been dreaming? He hoped that he hadn't. He looked up at the wall above his head at the little, scrunched up piece of paper, the man with the metal arm standing strong and proud. The winter soldier was always there protecting Bucky through all his bad as well as good times.

As he exited his room he was certain that the two woman in his living room would have been knocked out after their vigorous activities last night.

“Fuck yes, Natasha! Right there. Oh..”

He was wrong.

“Hmm, baby, you feel so good.. so wet for me…”

So very, very wrong.

Bucky instantly grimaced at the sight of Peggy on Natasha’s lap, riding her fingers hard and fast.

“Fuck guys! Seriously!? Have some respect for the people who actually live here. So, me! Please? Ugh,” he whined.

“We aren’t the ones with a 9am lecture.” He managed to hear Natasha’s mumbling against Peggy’s neck as he turned the kettle on to make his daily cup of tea.

“Shit!”

Bucky ran to his room, he had half an hour to get to the other side of campus. He picked the first set of shirts and pants that he hands could reach. He thanked god that he was organised enough to pack is bag the previous night. As he struggled to put his shoes on as he made his way to the door he glared at the girls one last time.

“By the time I get back. You. And you. Out.”

He ran out into the hallway and a mop of blond hair caught his eye making him momentarily freeze in his step.

“Steve!”

“Hey Buck.”

“I would love to catch up again but Stark. Lecture. Cannot be late.”

He gave Steve a small apologetic look and made his way down the stairs and legged it across the empty  campus. Once he made it to the lecture room his eyes fell upon an empty seat next, and then to a groggy, half-asleep man. He plopped down on the chair, a wide grin on his face. He held his breath as he lifted his backpack and let it drop from the high distance with a loud, echoing thud.

“WHAT THE FUCK!!”

“Oh. That… was… so… good… fucking… perfect!” Bucky managed to breathe out between his fits of laughter.

“Fuck you, Barnes!”

“Love you too, Wilson. Rough night, I guess? I mean, look at that bruise. That is one purple motherfucker right the-“

“Thank you very much, Mr. Barnes, that will be enough profanities for this morning.”

“Yeah right Stark, we all know that you are the biggest fucker of us all.”

“Quite right. Don’t forget it.”

The lecture continued as normal, with the occasional snickering from Bucky followed by harsh pokes to Sam’s face to jump start him awake. Sam, Bucky and Clint all had an hour break until their next lecture and their usual routine was to go and grab a coffee and a snack from the campus coffee shop.  

“Hey, Ange.”

“Oh, hey there, Buck. Sam. Clint, I'll get your usual, shall I?”

“Thanks, Darling.” They all sat at their usual seats. The window which was facing the campus garden which welcomed the image of students walking past. One of their favourite past times was to see who could concoct the funniest story about the students flooding past them. So far, Sam was the reigning champion but Bucky was very close to stealing the title, and nothing was going to stop him for doing so. Angie interrupted their first round to bring the Macchiatos and blueberry muffins, just before Sam could claim the winning title.

“Thanks Angie, hey, how is your theatre programme going?” Bucky knew how much Angie dreamed of being on the stage and  taking a small course at Julliard for musical theatre to improve her skills.

“Oh, its great, Buck, thanks for asking! We are starting to work on West Side Story and I know that I am definite choice for Maria.”

“I know you will be, darling.”

“Hey Buck, before I go, would it be too much for me to ask about English?” He knew what question was coming judging by the hopeful look etched on Angie’s face. He hated giving her the bad news every single week that she asked. It had been nearly two months since her and Peggy had broken up due to having “too many differences”, as they put it. However, Buck could tell that alongside their studies, arguing all the time was beginning to drain them out and they couldn’t afford it at this stage. Every week Angie came to them hoping for the news that Peggy would be missing her as much as she was. She longed to have an opportunity to run back into her arms and beg, to plead for her forgiveness.  Every week one of the boys had to say the same thing, explain the her again that Peggy had moved on, set her sights on other people and perhaps it was time for to do the same.

“Ange, I d-“

“It’s okay, Bucky, I know exactly what you are gonna say and…  I- I am happy for her.”

He could easily tell that she was trying her hardest to pull off a simple smile and he hated himself for causing this to one of the happiest people he knew. Before he could say anything to make it worse, she left them to get back to the other customers in the shop. He heard a loud groan coming from Sam as the memory from last night sparked at the mention of Peggy.

“Oh god, what did I do last night?”

“If it’s any consolation, I am definite you brought her and Nat closer with your shenanigans.”

He shuddered at the image of the two of the on his couch, twice. The sound of Clint laughing his ass off was enough to bring him back to reality.

“Talking of last night, me and Sam were very confused at the sudden ‘hey there is my childhood friend from the past and we are reunited years later’ thing with Steve?” Bucky laughed and rolled his eyes, eating his muffin. He knew that they has questions that they wanted answers but he wasn’t sure if he knew enough to answer them all. He had yet to actually sit down and catch up with Steve, and he was sure that there was a lot he had yet to find out about him.

“Yeah, yeah. Well looky at the time,” he changed the subject. He hated having the attention on him. He felt the pressure to please his friends and he was neither drunk nor awake enough to make that effort. He got up and grabbed his bag, stuffing the muffin in his mouth as he gave Angie a small wav and nod, mumbling goodbye incoherently causing him to choke on the crumbs of his muffin. Not his finest moment. He strode away from his laughing friends so he could take a leisurely walk to his next lecture with Doctor Banner.

\---

The day had finally come to an end and he was exhausted as fuck and needed to sleep. His feet hurt and his back was aching and he had an empty dorm room lulling him to deep sleep. Just as he was about to close his eyes he remembered his plans for the evening, Fuck! He was meant to meet Steve for coffee and catch up. He looked at his clock, it was five o’clock. Great! He had an hour until he had to be at the coffee shop. That left him with enough time to get changed and ready, and maybe he could even squeeze in a quick nap. Just a quick, simple nap. He totally needed it - he'd had lectures all day, half of them practicals, and then he had to socialise with his classmates and his friends. Yes. He totally deserved this nap and Steve would be so thankful when he turned up looking all ready and refreshed.

\---

_“Bucky! Get back upstairs! Now!” He heard his mother shout from the other end of his parent’s bedroom. He could see the large silhouette of his father towering over her. He couldn’t stand to hear his mother go through this agony one night longer._

_“M-mummy?”_

_“It’s going to be alright, baby, go and check on your little sister okay,” he could hear the shaking and the quiver in her voice, and knew she wasn’t feeling good. He always wanted his mummy to feel good because she always looked after him even when she took him away from his best friend. The way her eyes looked at him made him feel sad and scared. Was it because she felt scared? Why would daddy make his mummy sad? She was so good to all of them, making sure they were happy. He gave her a small smile and nod. He  ran to his sister’s room, just opposite his own. Just as he entered he was certain he could hear a small whimpering voice._

_“Please baby, I am so sorry, please, please, baby, please…” He felt a strange sensation as soon as he heard a loud thud and a small weak whimpering scream that followed. He checked in on his sister, who still asleep throughout all of this. Thank God. He kissed her goodnight and then he crept up to his parent’s room. The first thing he saw was his mother on the floor, shivering and trembling, a hand covering her face. He didn’t understand why she was doing that. Was his mummy crying? Mummies aren’t supposed to cry, not his mummy, she was the strongest woman he knew._

_“B-bucky, no… go… back…”_

_That only made him more curious, walking towards the room without realising._

_“DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH HIM”_

_His mother’s scream made him jump and realise that his father was now staring down at him. His heart now racing, hard and fast. He was scared, really scared._

_“You little piece of shit! Why don’t you ever listen! Why won’t you listen to your mother! You are worthless piece of trash! What kind of son can’t listen to their mummy?! Certainly not mine. You…_

_“No.. no.. noo NOO! GEORGE NO!”_

_“Are. No. Son. Of. Mine!” He was shaking on the spot, sweat trickling down his face and his legs paralysed. Why couldn’t he move?! He needs to move! BUCKY MOVE! NOW! He was too frightened to look at his father, he had disappointed him, and he felt shame overcome him. He managed to look up in the moment of silence between his father’s ramblings and his mother’s endless pleadings. He just managed to catch the sight of a fist flying in his direction, aiming right for his fa-_

Scream! He needed to scream. Bucky’s body shot up, arms over his face in defence. It wasn’t real. It was a dream, none of it was real. But it was at some point. He couldn’t protect his mother or himself. The moonlight flowing in from the window made his metallic arm glint, catching his eye. He looked down at it in shame. He wasn’t strong, he wasn’t strong when he needed to be and this arm was his constant reminder of his failure. He was so engrossed in his nightmare, trying to level his breathing and heartbeat that he hadn't realised how dark it had gotten outside. At that moment he caught on to the loud knocking coming from the direction of his front door. Then it dawned on him what he did. Shit! Steve! He missed it, he was such a terrible friend sleeping over his meet up.

He went to the door and was welcomed to the image of a frantically worried Steve Rogers, his hand nearly knocking Bucky in his face. The panic washed over him as he flinched and instinctively caught Steve’s wrist.

“Oh god, sorry Steve!” He let go of Steve’s wrist. “It was a force of habit I guess,” he shrugged, trying not to give any hints to what was racing through his mind.

“Sorry, I was waiting for you in the coffee shop and I guessed after an hour and a half of waiting that you weren’t coming. Angie told me that wasn’t like you and so I came here and I knocked. No answer, and so I assumed you weren’t here and then…”

Bucky could feel his body tense knowing what Steve was going to say next and he didn’t want to hear it.

“I heard screaming. You sounded like you were begging or something and I panicked and I just kept banging on the door and you kept screa-“

“Steve, stop, I get the picture!”

His eyes were downcast, unable to look at his friend in shame at what Steve had witnessed. He was too busy overthinking that he didn’t feel Steve’s hands on his shoulders. He then realised that it was stop his body from shaking. Oh god, what if he didn’t want to be his friend anymore? It was bad enough that he had only one limb, with ugly scars for the whole word to see. Now Steve could see how broken he truly was. No one could love a freak like him, let alone be friends with him.

He looked up to see the familiar décor of his kitchen and not the hallway like he expected. Steve had taken him inside and was now slowly placing him down on his sofa. As he was focusing in on the situation he could now hear Steve attempting to comfort him with “It’s gonna be okay Buck” and “It was just a dream. It wasn’t real.” Why? Why was Steve doing this? Why was he making all the effort to make sure he was okay?

“Because I am your friend, jerk.”

Steve was teasing him-  he hadn't even been aware that he had voiced his concerns out loud.  He felt himself being guided to rest his head on Steve’s shoulders, it was much less bonier than he could remember, and this time definitely felt more welcoming.

“Shh, I got you, just rest okay, I am gonna stay here until you fall asleep, okay?”

He felt the sensation of Steve’s fingers running through his hair, and- oh no, this was one of his biggest weaknesses. Bucky was now putty in Steve’s hands and it seemed that Steve clearly remembered this fact about him. But he was too far gone to think about it any further,  purring into Steve’s neck as he felt himself get drowsy, unable to protest to anything beyond his point. The TV’s light almost woke him up again but Steve soothed him back into a dreamless sleep, his head now dropping down to Steve’s lap. This made it so much easier for Steve to keep massaging his scalp. Hmm... he could definitely get used to this.

The second time he was driven awake was when Steve had clearly decided to stay with him all night and thought it best to adjust himself so he could sleep better. He felt himself move as he head now was resting on a flatter surface. He fluttered his eyes to see Steve’s steady moving chest and he smiled to himself. If he felt the small pressure at the top of his head, Steve kissing his head like he did twelve years ago, then he would keep it to himself.

  
  
  
  
  



	5. just a quick update!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just posting this to update you guys with news that i am returning to this fic! i am halfway through the next chapter. it's going to be a long one to say sorry for being nearly 2 years too late. Not that there is anyone that is interested in me returning. Until then here is a little excerpt of the next chap to keep you company. 
> 
> I love you all.  
> Marina :D

Morning came around and Bucky woke up as the sun shone through the exposed window. It took him moment to process his surroundings. His sofa had never felt like this. Why was it moving up and down beneath him? He opened his eyes they welcomed the image of blonde hair, light scruff and long eyelashes. Steve, he was on his sofa, under him. Sleeping? He tried to remember what happened before he slept. He remembered having his usual nightmare about his father and waking up to Steve Rogers pounding at his door. Oh it definitely wasn’t dream and couldn’t have been happening  
He knew that if he moved a muscle then he would wake Steve up and waste the opportunity to admire the up close beauty that was etched across his face. They were close enough that Bucky could count every little freckle on his face. He remembered hearing Sarah Rogers tell Steve that every freckle was like star and his face was the most beautiful galaxy that she had ever seen.  
As the time dragged on Bucky started to feel restless and decided it was time to move. He took one breath and attempted to push himself off the sofa. His balance was too shaky that it resulted in him falling face first on the floor. The loud bang caused Steve to jump up in shock. 

“Oh my god! Bucky! Are you okay?!” Steve joined him on the floor, hands holding his face carefully as Steve assessed the damaged. There was a slight bruising on the top of his head but otherwise he was fine.  
“I am just peachy Rogers, though I could use some help getting up if that isn’t too much for you?” he stared at Steve’s ridiculously muscled arms as they tensed in the process of getting back up. He imagined how good it would feel if those arms were holding him up against the wall as Steve would be fu-  
“Earth to Bucky! Hello!” Bucky pulled away from his ridiculous daydream to stare back at those baby blues.  
“I… err… um yeah hi. Sorry about that but damn you weigh like a ton.”  
“Oh really? Well you are definitely the first to complain, “ Steve laughed as he made his way to Bucky’s freezer to put something on his forming bruise but all he was an empty freezer. “You seriously haven’t got anything in your freezer!? What is wrong with you?”  
“You mean what is wrong with the government that they had to made living so expensive for poor helpless students” Bucky retorted trying to get up but ended up getting too nauseous and fell right back down. 

“I will be right back I am gonna get some frozen veg from my own freezer. Don’t close your eyes or sleep! You go that?”  
“Yes sir,” Bucky giggled to himself. As he watched Steve walk out he reached for the remote and watched the first cartoon show that came on. Just his luck it was his favourite one; Adventure time. He began to feel a bit drowsy as soon as the opening theme finished and before Steve could return. He thought a little nap would be a good idea.  
What Bucky thought was a few moments actually ended up being three hours. He woke up to the smell of pancakes and chocolate and his favourite, coffee. His eyes welcomed the image of Steve waltzed around the kitchen, whistling softly. Bucky felt the need to savour the image, it was a sweet, heart warming one. He stretched his arms and silently tiptoed his way behind Steve and jabbed his fingers into his sides. 

“WHAT THE FUCK!” Steve’s screams filled the room as he dropped the glass of orange juice that was in his hand.  
“What the fuck is wrong with you bucky!?”  
“Consider it payback for the whole concussion thing” he teased as he went to work on cleaning up the mess on the floor. When he was done he turned to find Steve standing at the coffee table with two plates of fresh pancakes. One drenched in syrup, the other plate dry as a bone. “Oh my god! You remembered” he gushed at the sentiment of it all. 

\---

September 2001  
“Bucky! We need to go to school or we will get in lots of trouble!” the small skinny blonde nervously shifted around the kitchen, he was not exactly feeling ready for starting ‘big boys’ school as his mother called it. Steve wanted to make the best first impression with all the teachers and his classmates. Bucky on the other hand wanted to breeze through it all. On top of that he loved to tease Steve and watch him squirm around nervously as he sweated like a helpless little piggy.  
“Stevieeee relax!” he teased while he finished helping his mother plate up the pancakes. “It’s pancake time! The best time of the day, not silly school.” Lucky for the both of them, Bucky’s apartment was placed ten minutes away from their school. Once the pancakes were on the table, Bucky pushed his best friend to his seat and went to his own.  
“Syrup?” Steve declined as he watched him soak his breakfast in maple syrup. From that moment Steve always met up at Bucky’s house and ate their pancakes until the absolute last minute on the  
first day of semester.

\---

“I know it’s not the beginning of school or the semester but I thought it kind of feels like we are starting the semester as reunited friends that the occasion called for it.” Bucky adored how much of a cheesy sap Steve was, he always was for as long as he could remember. They both ate while watching TV. The rest of the morning.


End file.
